The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in


The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times ❰Read❯ ➪ The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times Author Pema Chödrön – Natus-physiotherapy.co.uk We always have a choice, Pema Ch dr n teaches We can let the circumstances of our lives harden us and make us increasingly resentful and afraid, or we can let them soften us and make us kinder Here, P That Scare MOBI ☆ We always have a choice, Pema Ch dr n teaches We can let the circumstances of our lives harden us The Places PDF/EPUB or and make us increasingly resentful and afraid, or we can let them soften us and make us kinder Here, Pema provides Places That Scare Kindle Ø tools to deal with the problems and difficulties that life throws our way This wisdom is always available to us, she teaches, but we usually block it with habitual patterns rooted in fear Beyond that fear lies a state of openheartedness and tenderness This book teaches us how to awaken our basic goodness and connect with others, to accept ourselves and others complete with faults and imperfections, and to stay in the present moment by seeing through the strategies of ego that cause us to resist life as it is.


10 thoughts on “The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times

  1. Lindsay Lindsay says:

    As I was brushing my teeth this morning after finishing this book, this line came into my head When I find myself of times of trouble, Pema Chodron calls to me, speaking words of wisdom Let it beCorny, huh Totally true I read When Things Fall Apart over a year ago when I was going through a really rough time, and when I hit a serious road block nearly two months ago, I picked this n up In similar fashion with my reading habits of late, I only just finished this wonderful morsel I won t b As I was brushing my teeth this morning after finishing this book, this line came into my head When I find myself of times of trouble, Pema Chodron calls to me, speaking words of wisdom Let it beCorny, huh Totally true I read When Things Fall Apart over a year ago when I was going through a really rough time, and when I hit a serious road block nearly two months ago, I picked this n up In similar fashion with my reading habits of late, I only just finished this wonderful morsel I won t be stashing it away on the old bookshelf just yet though I ve still got tough times to face, so it will stay right where it is on my nightstand.At first I was totally repelled by the title in accordance with my instant aversion to anything sounding like a self help book perhaps that s too telling I bristled before falling in love with Amy Hempel s Reasons to Live , but then I thought, You know what I do need help And then, Yeah, cause you know what I am freaked the F out right now I love her She is the most accesible Buddhist author I ve yet encountered Her approach is realistic even though I am still struggling with the craziness, I am slowly able to incorporate the exercises, acting on the moment.Favorite line All too frequently we relate like timid birds who don t dare to leave the nest Here we sit in a nest that s getting pretty smelly and that hasn t served its function for a very long time 8 You heard it, folks Smelly nest


  2. Michelle Michelle says:

    I was at B N looking for some other book when I mistakenly picked up this one so I placed it back on the shelf and thought nothing of it The next day I went back to B N to purchase a different book and I accidently pick this same book up AGAIN SO I placed it back on the shelf the top shelf and continued looking Then out of nowhere the books from the top shelf fell on my head When I looked at the pile they were all books by Pema Chodron So, I began picking them up and when I looked at the I was at BN looking for some other book when I mistakenly picked up this one so I placed it back on the shelf and thought nothing of it The next day I went back to BN to purchase a different book and I accidently pick this same book up AGAIN SO I placed it back on the shelf the top shelf and continued looking Then out of nowhere the books from the top shelf fell on my head When I looked at the pile they were all books by Pema Chodron So, I began picking them up and when I looked at the shelf next to me the second shelf from the bottom there was another row of books by Pema Chodron obviously placed on the wrong shelf and the cover of this book staring at me So, I bought it and found out why this book left a lump on my headSyncronicity


  3. Ron Ron says:

    In the current age of anxiety, Pema Ch dr n is both a refreshing and challenging voice Basically, she encourages us to see problems as spiritual opportunities Instead of trying to run from discomfort, she advocates staying put and learning about ourselves Instead of habitually reaching for whatever palliative gives relief always temporary she suggests feeling and observing our discomforts, becomingfully present in our lives, learning how to be truly here now Only through this pro In the current age of anxiety, Pema Ch dr n is both a refreshing and challenging voice Basically, she encourages us to see problems as spiritual opportunities Instead of trying to run from discomfort, she advocates staying put and learning about ourselves Instead of habitually reaching for whatever palliative gives relief always temporary she suggests feeling and observing our discomforts, becomingfully present in our lives, learning how to be truly here now Only through this process, she says, can we experience the deep joy of being alive.This is a great companion volume to her book When Things Fall Apart It elaborates on themes introduced there, describing several practices of Tibetan Buddhism, some ancient and long forgotten, which help us not only cope with anxiety but use it to overcome fearfulness This is an important spiritual effort because while we typically think of hate as the enemy of love, it is really fear that makes love difficult Fear immobilizes us, makes us pull the covers over our heads, and isolates us from others.Ch dr n, a student of Ch gyam Trungpa, encourages the consistent practice of meditation And she discounts the usual results driven expectations people associate with it, pointing out that as we confront our true selves in meditation, it often becomesanddifficult, not easier And for those who have found meditation fiercely frustrating, as I have, she has alternatives The practice of tonglen is one simple spiritual ritual that can be done anywhere, anytime, providing a dramatic and freeing shift in emotional perspective Learning not to let disappointment, anger, and hurt trigger our personal melodramas, which sap our energy, we can find our way to greater equanimity and become a less destructive presence in the world.I strongly recommend this book as a welcome spiritual tonic in troubled times, whether that trouble originates elsewhere or from within As with her other books, you can read and reread it, each time discovering much to learn and reflect on and in her words, this is news you can use


  4. Esra Bestel Esra Bestel says:

    The most important part of this book is the last one, being in between That is the place where I find myself over and over again.Here how Pema explains it We are told about the pain of chasing after pleasure and futility of running from pain We hear about the joy of awakening, of realizing our interconnectedness, of trusting the openness of our hearts and minds But we are not told all that much about this state of being in between, no longer able to get our old comfort from outside but not y The most important part of this book is the last one, being in between That is the place where I find myself over and over again.Here how Pema explains it We are told about the pain of chasing after pleasure and futility of running from pain We hear about the joy of awakening, of realizing our interconnectedness, of trusting the openness of our hearts and minds But we are not told all that much about this state of being in between, no longer able to get our old comfort from outside but not yet dwelling in a continual sense of equanimity and warmth Anxiety, heartbreak and tenderness mark the in between state It is the kind of place we usually want to avoid The challange is to stay in the middle rather than buy into struggle and complaint The challange is to let it soften us rather than make usrigid and afraid Becoming intimate with the queasy feeling of being in the middle of nowhere only makes our heartstender When we are brave enough to stay in the middle, compassion arises spontaneously By not knowing, not hoping to know, and not acting like we know what is happenning, we begin to access our inner strength


  5. Vicki Vicki says:

    took this book to read on my first jury duty summons Didn t realize I was reading a self help book until I was done Uplifting and encouraging like a little Yoda in my backpack.


  6. Roy Lotz Roy Lotz says:

    Authentic joy is not a euphoric state or a feeling of being high Rather, it is a state of appreciation that allows us to participate fully in our lives. In my life, times of crisis or great change, though painful, have had the power to reawaken me I remind myself of what is important and what is trivial I take joys in simple things and appreciate everyday good fortune I empathizereadily and reactkindly I feel fully myself and fully aware.But such elevated states quickly fade Authentic joy is not a euphoric state or a feeling of being high Rather, it is a state of appreciation that allows us to participate fully in our lives. In my life, times of crisis or great change, though painful, have had the power to reawaken me I remind myself of what is important and what is trivial I take joys in simple things and appreciate everyday good fortune I empathizereadily and reactkindly I feel fully myself and fully aware.But such elevated states quickly fade Routine is reestablished, and I find myself, once again, absorbed in trifles, disturbed by petty annoyances, numb to beauty, dull to my surroundings, careless of other people, focused on nothings, and generally unaware This is not a particularly happy state I do not even like myself when I am in this humdrum mode of existence Like Hamlet, I feel as if I am bound in shell, hounded by bad dreams I want a way to reawaken the state of mind that crises have elicited from me but without the crises, of course This is why I turned to Pema Ch dr n, hoping that her secular Buddhism might help to crack my existential nut The central premise of this book is that the crisis state I described above one of openness to the world, sympathy with others, joy in simple things is basic to human life, and gets covered up through fear We fear emotional pain so we do not empathize or connect with others we fear change so we stick to familiar paths that do not allow us to grow we fear failure so we create grandiose illusions about ourselves and then work to preserve them And so on, fearing this and that, with the end result being that we close ourselves off.Now, philosophers and psychologists can argue whether any state is basic to human life, and what is the mechanism through which unhappiness arises But in my experience it is certainly true that overcoming fears helps to reconnect me with the world in that basic, joyful way I described above In this book, Ch dr n is focused on overcoming fear through empathy and she offers several meditative exercises to cultivate fellow feeling The point is to contact an earnest feeling of goodwill and encourage it to expand I have tried these exercises, with limited success I am afraid, but I think that the concept is sound that we can develop our compassion, which will allow us to act bothethically and livehappily.In the meantime, however, I am afraid it s back to the nutshell for me


  7. BrokenTune BrokenTune says:

    4.5We cling to a fixed idea of who we are and it cripples us Nothing and no one is fixed Whether the reality of change is a source of freedom for us or a source of horrific anxiety makes a significant difference Do the days of our lives add up to further suffering or to increased capacity for joy That s an important questionNot much to say about this one Pema has a great way of explaining concepts relating to meditation, but I would not recommend this book to someone who is new to Budd 4.5We cling to a fixed idea of who we are and it cripples us Nothing and no one is fixed Whether the reality of change is a source of freedom for us or a source of horrific anxiety makes a significant difference Do the days of our lives add up to further suffering or to increased capacity for joy That s an important questionNot much to say about this one Pema has a great way of explaining concepts relating to meditation, but I would not recommend this book to someone who is new to Buddhism or meditation practice If anything, this book is a good accompaniment but it does require some familiarity with terms and concepts Nevertheless, a thoughtful compilation of stories and advice which invites readers and practitioners to question everything


  8. Caidyn (BW Reviews; he/him/his) Caidyn (BW Reviews; he/him/his) says:

    I really needed this book I checked this out before the election because we read the first four chapters of the class and I wanted to read the rest However, when the election hit, I wasn t expecting the results Hate won and the place that scared me is now a reality Basically, I needed this to calm my brain down and find a way to make sense of things.I m very familiar with Buddhism My mom is very well practiced in teachings, especially ones to do with love She taught me my whole life to be I really needed this book I checked this out before the election because we read the first four chapters of the class and I wanted to read the rest However, when the election hit, I wasn t expecting the results Hate won and the place that scared me is now a reality Basically, I needed this to calm my brain down and find a way to make sense of things.I m very familiar with Buddhism My mom is very well practiced in teachings, especially ones to do with love She taught me my whole life to be kind to other people, to find one thing in common with someone no matter how much you don t like them, and if something bothers me that I need to take a step back and ask myself why All of the teachings Chodron brings up in this book are ones I ve lived with, just without names and specific practices.Honestly, I recommend this book for everyone If there s something that s scaring you or just upsetting you, it may help in some way Some aspect of it will I mean, it helped me come to a better peace with who our next president is going to be, so that s pretty damn good given that I was really pissed off and now I mchill about it Until shit goes down the drain And if I had actually finished reading this a few days ago, you all would have gotten a better review but oops


  9. Peter Landau Peter Landau says:

    I hate self help books almost as much as I hate sentences that begin with I It s the writing, which is uniformly poor, at least I think so Bad writing is hand holding writing I m not a dog in a collar being taken for a walk on a leash But maybe I should be.My wife gave me THE PLACES THAT SCARE YOU A GUIDE TO FEARLESSNESS IN DIFFICULT TIMES by Pema Ch dr n as a Father s Day gift I read it right away, snapping the neck of my routine reading schedule to hang by its own anxiety until dead Tha I hate self help books almost as much as I hate sentences that begin with I It s the writing, which is uniformly poor, at least I think so Bad writing is hand holding writing I m not a dog in a collar being taken for a walk on a leash But maybe I should be.My wife gave me THE PLACES THAT SCARE YOU A GUIDE TO FEARLESSNESS IN DIFFICULT TIMES by Pema Ch dr n as a Father s Day gift I read it right away, snapping the neck of my routine reading schedule to hang by its own anxiety until dead That was my first step The second was an open mind The third was applying the principles The fourth is the first, like an M.C Escher staircase, it takes you to the beginning The paradox of asking unanswerable questions is the closest I ve come to a genuine spiritual practice I still don t like self help books, just as I still don t like sentences that begin with I, but now I think this may not be a self help book at all, but an other help book, a user s manual, an operating system


  10. Will Will says:

    I ve always been leery of the self help genre I m mistrustful of anyone who tells me how to think, feel, act I ve also seen people read self help books like serial novels, always chasing some specter of an ideal self with the assumption that their current self is somehow inadequate or broken These two perspectives have always repelled me from most anything self help Pema Ch dr n s The Places That Scare You came in a time of personal need and it s been a medicine I ve enjoyed taking for deal I ve always been leery of the self help genre I m mistrustful of anyone who tells me how to think, feel, act I ve also seen people read self help books like serial novels, always chasing some specter of an ideal self with the assumption that their current self is somehow inadequate or broken These two perspectives have always repelled me from most anything self help Pema Ch dr n s The Places That Scare You came in a time of personal need and it s been a medicine I ve enjoyed taking for dealing with the uncertainty and pains of life The writing is simple and clear Instruction and insight is provided in bite sized chapters, perfect to read, think on, and read again It can be a bit repetitive and some of the analogies seem a little flimsy but I think the book still stands as worthwhile and nourishing The Places That Scare You is an introduction to a particular perspective on Bodhicitta, lessons and ideas in exercising compassion and by doing so, come to accept ourselves note I m sure this is hugely reductive but bear with me I ve always thought that Buddhism focused on transcending ignorance, escaping the pain of life and maybe even fostering a sense of stoicism For all I know this is partially correct or there are some sects that do attempt this alone Bodhicitta isin line with mindfulness though, sidling up close to our emotions rather than trying to escape them, and not putting any judgement values on our thoughts and feelings Ch dr n says our emotions can be teachers and allow us to learn compassion, even for those we most violently clash with It s not about transcending life but savoring the highs and lows and being okay with it all For years now I ve noticed how difficult it is to exist calmly with uncertainty I ve held onto thoughts and beliefs with a kung fu death grip under the assumption they constitute a certain Will and to some extent, still do buy into this But those thoughts and emotions can serve as teachers, on one hand coming to a deeper empathy with friends, family, strangers, enemies, and on the other, being okay with myself


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